Sigh. Yes, I'm very aware that Cicely Tyson is on this new TIME cover. And seeing her age listed as 94 (read fine print on the cover, in the photo above) reopens some wounds for me.
If you didn't read my blog from November 21st of last year, please read it now to understand WHY I feel this pain, if you care to. In a nutshell, she's been lying about her age for many years, and it hurts.
A little history here...in October 2002 my first wife, Beth, (now with the Lord), saw an ad regarding the local Cicely Tyson School of Performing and Fine Arts. They were having Free Open Houses and we started going regularly, which gave me a chance to meet and greet Cicely Tyson (who I'd admired for 30 years prior to that.) Part of me wishes I could go back in time to 16 years ago today, when I gave Ms. Tyson the drawing I did of her (above). The date was Feb. 9th., 2003, and this took place at the School which bears her name (in East Orange, NJ, less than 4 miles from where we lived.).
A professional photographer captured the moment as I gave Ms. Tyson my artwork. This (above) is a collage featuring the DRAWING I did of her, which she appreciated so much. The drawing was based on when she portrayed Harriet Tubman in "A Woman Called Moses." It's in the center of the collage.
It was a huge thrill for me to meet Ms. Tyson as I'd admired her integrity (not taking roles demeaning to women, and portraying Christian women very often, etc.). She was very warm to me, as well!!
Those were happy days, but now I wish that this, my THIRD meeting with Tyson, was my last.
You see, later that year, in December 2003, "The Matriarch" of her School celebrated what she said was her 70th birthday when really it was her 79th, according to her recent revelations. And over the next seven years I was there, live, six MORE times when she misrepresented her age, portraying herself as 9 years younger to her students and everyone else in attendance. I wish I wasn't there now to hear those repeated, calculated lies because then I wouldn't have this pain seeing her on TIME. Now, Tyson's certainly not the FIRST actor who's lied about their age, but to do it to students who look up to you, in a School that's named after you?? That takes a special kind of hardness of heart, in my opinion. Was there no thought given to how those kids might be disillusioned, or tempted to lie themselves, once the truth (as it always does) came out?? Tyson's lie also caused me some embarrassment with my new wife, Mercedes, who'd been warning me for quite awhile that Tyson was lying about her age, that she was really 9 years older than what I'd heard her say, seven times, with my own ears. Frankly, it hurts that I had to admit I was wrong for defending Tyson while Tyson goes on without admitting any wrong, and collecting accolades for it, to boot.
Yes, I now wish that day 16 years ago was the last time I saw Cicely Tyson, because had I never heard her lies THEN I'd never know she was lying NOW. Maybe then I could actually feel good about that belated Oscar she's getting later this month, if I'd "quit while I was ahead." Instead, I'm remembering that quote of actor James Garner, who said "acting is just a sophisticated form of lying," and I'm realizing that what Ms. Tyson does so well on the screen and stage has, unfortunately, spilled over into her personal behavior...all of it to enhance her career opportunities in a weird CIRCLE.
Since finding out about The Lie three months ago, my new wife and I have MOVED and as you can see from the three photos above, I can't decide whether or not to rehang the once-prized momentos in my office in our new place. I won't TOSS them, but I'm not sure I want to be reminded of that day EVERY day anymore.
God works all things together for good (Romans 8:28) and I am learning through this NOT to be so trusting of people, only HE will never fail us or disappoint. And frankly, I'D be lying if I said I've never lied and hurt people BY my lies...I have, though never in such a repeated, methodical manner!!
But what I've gained from this situation is a new perspective on how it feels to be lied TO by someone...someone you respect...and how it (lying) is something I never want to do again. Ever.
Don't lie, people.
When tempted to lie, don't think of the passing GAIN that may come to you, think of the lasting PAIN that lying brings to others.
when people lie about the simple things, it makes you wonder about the other stories they tell....
ReplyDeleteI agree, and I've had to re-examine other public statements I've heard her say at the School and ask if THEY are true, ALSO. Things with even more serious implications.
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